http://kanelaw.net Fri, 01 Aug 2008 22:04:05 +0000 http://backend.userland.com/rss092 en Early Stage Divorce Mediation requires information gathering by couples between sessions with their mediator.  Without reliable data identifying and valuing the property to be divided and the budgets of wife and husband going forward, it’s impossible to make good decisions about property division and the need, if any, for spousal ... http://kanelaw.net/2008/08/01/the-importance-of-homework-in-divorce-mediation/ The very nasty and public Denise Richards-Charlie Sheen divorce brings home how vindictive and destructive divorces can be in America.  I don’t see people like that in my divorce mediation practice—husbands and wives who serve each other with divorce papers on Christmas Eve.    Granted, my clients may not like each ... http://kanelaw.net/2008/07/01/finding-a-good-family-law-mediator/ What does the untimely death of journalist, Tim Russert, have to do with couples choosing mediation or collaborative law to resolve their divorces? Plenty, it turns out. In today’s New York Times OP-ED, William Kristol writes that ‘Big Tim’ “died too young, But he lived more than ... http://kanelaw.net/2008/06/16/high-end-goals-in-compassionate-divorces%e2%80%94lessons-from-big-tim%e2%80%99s-death/ In my last blog, I discussed the difference between evaluative and facilitative mediators. How evaluative mediators are called in as the trial date approaches to settle the divorce by evaluating the legal strengths and weaknesses of each spouse’s “position.” Facilitative mediators, on the other hand, leave the ... http://kanelaw.net/2008/06/01/choosing-the-right-mediator%e2%80%94one-size-doesn%e2%80%99t-fit-all/ For divorcing couples considering mediation, it is important to understand that there are two very different kinds of mediation available to settle "out of court." Depending on whether they choose early stage facilitative mediation as opposed to "eve of trial" evaluative mediation,  their experiences and degree of emotional satisfaction are ... http://kanelaw.net/2008/05/16/choosing-the-right-mediator%e2%80%94evaluative-vs-facilitative/ From time to time, particularly in the spring, I get inquiries from couples who want my help as a mediator in negotiating a prenuptial agreement. Typically, the wedding date has been set several months down the road and either the bride or groom want an agreement to protect assets brought ... http://kanelaw.net/2008/05/01/mediating-prenuptial-agreements-the-opportunity-and-challenge/ I was so proud of Seattle during this past week as our fair city successfully hosted the “Seeds of Compassion” international gathering.  His Holiness, the Dali Lama, Archbishop Desmond Tutu, and other luminaries of the spirit drew thousands wanting to learn more about the role of compassion in improving our ... http://kanelaw.net/2008/04/16/the-compassionate-mediator-collaborative-lawyer/ Many couples I work with as a divorce mediator and collaborative lawyer have trouble communicating with each other. No surprise here, but certainly not helpful in negotiating with the help of a mediator or collaborative team how best to parent children and divide marital assets. It’s one thing to inform clients ... http://kanelaw.net/2008/04/01/communication-skills-help-in-difficult-conversations/ When I set the table for a mediation session, I’m sometimes reminded of all the hoopla surrounding the beginning of the Vietnam Peace Talks in Paris in the early 1970s. For those not around at the time, there were months of wrangling between the U.S. and North Vietnam on the ... http://kanelaw.net/2008/03/15/the-physical-environment-for-mediation-is-important/ As a family law mediator and collaborative law professional, I am constantly on the alert for signs that my clients lack self confidence in identifying and negotiating their respective needs going forward.  A wife or husband who feels powerless in negotiating parenting arrangements or financial matters cannot negotiate a durable ... http://kanelaw.net/2008/02/28/dealing-with-power-imbalances-in-mediation-the-collaborative-law-process/